Need to blog

I am socially awkward like a mortician at carrer day. I've lost touch with this part of myself that I miss so much but years of heartbreak has left my chest battletested and callused. If we were all conjured out of the dirt to be with one another then why did god make it seem so sadomasochistic? I've been at this school for about two months or so now I go through bout of homesickness but sometimes the illustrious lights of the city seem to be bekoning me, sunlight and brids chriping have taking the place of industry and desiel engines. Its hard to not feel lonely...